Rachael Kathryn Horton: Grief and Tributes
Perhaps it’s not common practice to publicly mourn the death of a dear friend, and if I were a gambler, I might bet that the majority of people wouldn’t understand the purpose of sharing your grief online – for anyone to find, for the whole world to see. But here I go – sharing my grief, mourning the loss of our dearest Rachael Kathryn.
Because the truth is, the Gibs met online. Our friendships first blossomed online, our daily interactions take place online, our undeniable bond, our unconditional love and support, our decade long sisterhood developed online. It was also online that Heather first discovered the tragic news, it was online that we wept, we consoled one another, we prayed for hours after finding out that our friend, our sister, our Rachael Kathryn – was gone. It is now online, that we are grieving together, our daily emails continue, with Rachael still included. We mourn, we question, we doubt, we wonder. We remember, relive and look towards the future – together, but online.
So it’s only natural that I take to the internet to share my thoughts, to unleash my anger and ask why, why Rachael Kathryn? Why this way? Why so soon? I ask how. How could you do this? How will her family recover? How will life continue, day after day, without the voice of Rachael Kathryn? How will the Gibs move past this loss? How will our futures unfold without Rachael Kathryn?
I find joy in typing her name. I like reading it. I like hearing aloud in my mind as I read it. I call her number, and listen to her voice mail.
The other Gibs are grieving, some more so than me, and my heart breaks for us – us as a circle of friends, and each of us individually. I’m grieving for Rachael Kathryn’s family. Aaron’s family. Their friends from home.
Simply put, life is just not fair. Life is not easy, it is not fair, and it’s course is completely, utterly out of our control.
Rachael Kathryn, our hearts have not yet healed, nor would anyone expect them to so soon, but as we revisit your words, as we visit with one another, and some day travel to your gravesite, our hearts will mend. Our thoughts will be filled with your presence, our lives filled with your love, and our emails *filled* with your -isms.
Additional Gib tributes to Rachael Kathryn: