Earlier this evening, call-by-call-by-call, news spread through the circle of Gibs that our very own Rachael Kathryn and her beloved, devoted husband Aaron Horton had passed away.  Tears, shaking, sobbing, anger, anxiety, disbelief.  We all connected quite quickly, texts and bbms turned into phone calls, Facebook chats turned into a group Skype call.  We sat online – the only place all 12 of us have ever connected – and cried.  We sat in silence.  We prayed.

Rachael Kathryn was not only the most beautiful, angelic woman we’d ever known, but she was the most wise, the most kind, the most gentle and patient of us all – without question.  Rachael listened harder, felt with more sincerity and wept with more passion than any of us.  She was the one we all turned to when we needed comforting words.  She jumped into the middle of our frantic lives to provide guidance and direction.  She set us all at peace.  And now, when we need her more than ever, we are without her – physically.  Our emails will forever be void of her wisdom.  Our baby showers, weddings and birthdays will come and go without her heartfelt wishes.

In Rachael Kathryn’s absence, I feel like there is no one to turn but to God.  Nothing to rely on but faith.  Faith – the one thing Rachael cherished above all other.

Hours after crying, talking, praying, the Gibs signed offline, one by one.  One by one we said goodnight, each of us off to face a hard night – trying to sleep, welcoming Rachael to our dreams.  Before I settled in to bed, I saw Inbox (1) and opened my new mail.  A horoscope.  So fitting considering the Gib’s love affair for astrology.

My horoscope reads:

• “Just for today, you should try and ignore your habit of always trying to find an explanation for everything, Whitney. Something is changing inside you, and in the way you react to situations, and the desire to incorporate the more unpredictable aspects of life into your personality is the basis for these changes. A lot of your theories are only there to reassure you Whitney. But you probably already know that. Why don’t you just try being honest with yourself?”

Sweet dreams.